I have a secret I know that I should tell.
Afraid to say these things,
The pain inside me dwells.So much fear deep within my soul,
I want to let it out and
Let the right people know.

Now the sands of reality are gently sinking in.
I want to tell,
But it's so hard to say the words.
It's just a dream, just a dream.
I wish I could believe
That that scene was just a dream.
I wish my reality was
Just a dream.

So many years ago he came into that room.
He locked the door and said,
"I'll take good care of you".
The way he hurt me,
It left me with a scar.
I wish he could know how
He tore my life apart.

These days seem so hard,
I just can't do what is right.
Come and help me take back my life.
I want to be the person I once was.
I want to go back,
Back before it all.

I wish I could leave it all behind me now.
I want to leave it there.
Go back before like it was.
A memory I won't have to carry.

-Lindsay Adams

Shards

blurred images, fragmented and
scattered, helpless to overcome
them as I was overcome

these broken images of my soul
condemn me, damning me for
that which I was unable to change

once again grieving the loss of
myself relentlessly questioning
how many times one can suffer thus
and continue crying and breathing
and cutting and bleeding

mourn the loss, this shard of your soul
turned against you, to pierce you
then plunged into the silent abyss,
the whispered terror of his hatred

-Anya

The Circle of Life

the space is infinite
and i feel lost in this place
where do i go?
who do i run to?
where does the pain end?
why?
why is it lonely here?
why do i lose all hope?
why do i cry at night?
who can i call on for support?
why do i feel like i need all these questions answered to go on?
sometimes i sit by myself and realize that when everyone is there
no one is there
and i realize now
that people scare me
that people hurt others
and it doesn't effect their existence one bit
not because they don't care
because they don't know
they blind themselves from the world
but one day they will say their eyes hurt
and it will be because it is the first time they have actually used them.
and one day they will say someone hurt them
but the same circle will go through its phase
it must be the true nature of earth
everything spins
everything is a cycle
the earth spins on its axis
and it doesn't realize it.
i don't know if there is anyone who truly understands the origin of pain
because if they did maybe there would be a cure.
but pain is one thing like love
it stays with you no matter how hard you try to get rid of it
or forget about it.
but now i am on the subject of love
and it is a never ending story of pain
the two are intertwined
one not being able to exist without the other.
most people spek of love and only let one side of it exist
the joy, the happiness, the bliss of it all
but in reality
love hurts
it hurts to love and find out the person does not love you back
it hurts to love and not be able to tell someone
and it hurts to find out that someone you loved has betrayed you
and it hurts like hell to find out that you really know what love is
not a feeling of bliss
but sometimes a feeling of lonliness and emptiness
because we are human
and sometimes we realize things like love a little too late
we let it slip through our fingers
and die as quickly as it was born
because we no longer appreciate things like love
we trap ourselves in our own prisons
throwing the keys away forever
only to realize then
that there is no longer a way out
and it is not a myth
a theory
because you can look at anyone
and see this entrapment in their eyes
and they look for an exit through others
for selfish reasonsand suck the life out of them
until they can no longer function without pain
and pain becomes a part of the life that we always knew
but never wanted to be in.
-Sabrina